Pius Pompus Priests Plus Poor Puzzled Parishioners Produces Pissed People

Goodness I have been so busy!

So I basically have the entire wedding planned. Seriously. I got engaged less than a month ago and its basically done.

Mind you I still have to deal with the Stag n' Doe (which I hear is actually a southern ontario tradition - so I am not sure if anyone will know what I mean by this, but its a huge party that the bridal party organizes with the couple and sells tickets to. There are gambling games and a bar, and any profits go to the couple towards a honeymoon or the wedding itself) but otherwise its done.

Last night I had an interesting evening. We went to the church I have attended most of my life for a Marriage Prep Meeting. James and I were a little shocked at what happened.

For ease sake I am reposting here a letter I wrote to my uncle who had inquired about how it went - he is also my godfather.


Here are is the corespondance:

Hey - good to see you yesterday. We asked Andrew about the ring bearer thing, and at first he said no, because he didn't want to be a "Bear". But then we explained the diff b/w bear and bearer, and he's much happier now. So hopefully he's be good on the day.


How'd the meeting go last night?

Love

Z


Nice seeing you yesterday too, glad Andrew was receptive. :)

(My uncle has two children Andrew and Sara, Andrew is my 5 year old cousin - My uncle is actually not much older than I am as he was a surprise to my grandparents shortly before their retirement so we have a much more brother sister relationship than that of uncle / neice.. also our daughters are the same age)


The meeting was interesting. The priest was actually kind of a douche - sad but true. There were three couples there including James and I, and the other two were 'parishiners' - yet seemingly have never really attended. I attended every sunday when I lived in Etobicoke, but never have formally registered and so when he asked if I was a member of the parish, I said "technically no, but " he cut me off at that point and said in a very rude tone 'the please, do tell me why you are here'. At that point I was a little stunned and just muttered "well I am ___________'s grandaughter and " again cut off by "Well that is very interesting." and he proceeded with the meeting.

Part way though he was talking about God and how when you are a part of a parish you are a child of god. At which point he turned to James and I and said " (SPW), incase I am not being clear - God does not have grandchildren - he has children. And you either are or you are not a child of god... but again, God has no 'grandchildren".

The evening continued with him making continual examples of James and I. He also argued with James infront of the group that he was not a roman catholic but that he was a protestant and that the church he was baptized in was protestant. (Completely inaccurate - he was confusing two churches and somehow felt that James and his parents were unaware of their actual religion - which would be like me trying to convince you that you are actually a hasidic jew and that Baba and Didi were just confused when they told you you were a catholic).

He also pointed out in front of the group - rather than pulling us aside later- when he saw our papers that we filled out that we share an address, and theirfore we are living in mortal sin and should not be married and separate immediately. When I explained that that simply would not happen and that perhaps getting married in the church was not for us, and that we would gladly consider getting married at James' God mother's church he wanted to know who she was. When he heard her name and realzied that she is a significant part of ukrainian catholic community- and that he had been to some of her thology classes and such he changed his tune completely.

I think it also humbled him a little when we came to a portion of his lession that involved 'quizing us on how catholic we really are' and his 'parishiners' who he was very buddy buddy with in an attempt to make us feel ashamed - couldnt answer a single question yet James and I had all of them.

Anyways, after the meeting I asked to speak with him privately and told him that while we are trying to make our spirituallity part of our lives again, he is making us want to run for the hills and that perhaps he should rethink his approach.

So I guess you run into some people who are a little to pius. Luckily we are getting married - should everything go to plan- by father andri who is wonderful and we have talked to him before and enjoyed the conversations.

Sorry for the long response but I figured "Terrible" was an answer that would just leave you going Huh?

:D

Love
S




Anyways this whole ordeal really annoys me because James has grown up in a very athiest invironment in a way. His family does not practice their religion so it was a struggle to get him to come around and join me in my desires to be married in my church - and rather than welcome a new soul to everything, this priest made ME even want to walk away from the church and never look back.


Priest should be a representation of Christ and his love. Not feel that they are the judges of our trespasses.

I am no devout catholic - nor will I likely ever agree with all the catholic church believes (some of it even makes me shake my head) but I have a relationship with God and want him in my marriage. And to me, that says something.